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I would think many, if not all of you, have had similar experiences.
Paula
Eating at other people's homes....
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humbird753
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Eating at other people's homes....
My husband and I went to visit an elderly couple we have gotten to know very well the past 18 years. She is 85 and he's 87. We ate at home before going, and never intended on eating at their place. They are Norwegian and she bakes a lot. She usually brings out a plate of about 50 assorted cookies (just for 4 people)! Instead of that, she suggested we stay as they were having a favorite of theirs from years gone by. It was called Grot (mush in English). It is made of milk, flour and salt and is cooked to a very thick consistency. She then adds butter, brown or white sugar, and cinnamon to it. In addition to that they had salami, and a huge plate full of her homemade Norwegian Christmas cookies. So... while I sat and ate grapes, I watched in amazement as they all downed all of this GLUTEN!!! And they all felt sorry for me??!! It wasn't even appealing. I guess now that I'm starting to "get it," all I see when I look at that is the bathroom.
I would think many, if not all of you, have had similar experiences.
Paula
I would think many, if not all of you, have had similar experiences.
Paula
Paula
"You'll never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."
"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass... It's learning to dance in the rain."
"You'll never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have."
"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass... It's learning to dance in the rain."
Paula, that sounds like romme grot, which we discussed here in a previous link. Mine also has cream and sour cream
in it and is very rich. It is a family favorite for Christmas morning and I discovered it can be made with sweet rice flour. I do still drool over some of the Norwegian pastries but am also finding myself not missing a lot of the gluten foods.
in it and is very rich. It is a family favorite for Christmas morning and I discovered it can be made with sweet rice flour. I do still drool over some of the Norwegian pastries but am also finding myself not missing a lot of the gluten foods.
Paula,
I've had that experience, too - where people are feeling sorry for me, and I am kind of feeling sorry for them
It's amazing how central wheat flour is in our diets, and how little value or flavor it contributes. (It sure is good at texture, though!)
Glad you got through that in good health and good spirits. It's good when we can feel the sharing, even if we don't actually partake in the eating. Good for you.
Sara
I've had that experience, too - where people are feeling sorry for me, and I am kind of feeling sorry for them
It's amazing how central wheat flour is in our diets, and how little value or flavor it contributes. (It sure is good at texture, though!)Glad you got through that in good health and good spirits. It's good when we can feel the sharing, even if we don't actually partake in the eating. Good for you.
Sara
Paula,
Good for you. I feel the same way that you described. As Sara said, while everyone else is feeling sorry for me, I'm feeling sorry for them, because I am the only one there who recognizes that what they are eating is not food at all, but a wolf in sheep's clothing.
Tex
Good for you. I feel the same way that you described. As Sara said, while everyone else is feeling sorry for me, I'm feeling sorry for them, because I am the only one there who recognizes that what they are eating is not food at all, but a wolf in sheep's clothing.
Tex
It is suspected that some of the hardest material known to science can be found in the skulls of GI specialists who insist that diet has nothing to do with the treatment of microscopic colitis.
I went to a birthday dinner at a local restaurant on Saturday, and called ahead to see what, if anything, was "safe" for me on their menu. Steak, steamed green beans, and a small salad w/o croutons! Absolutely everything else, including their 4-layer dessert cakes, was gluten- and cheese-laden. The steak was really good, though, and so were the beans! And I discovered that I can, after all, have iceberg lettuce, in small amounts, because I was fine afterward. It was hard to watch everyone having birthday cake, though!
Pat C.
"Don't sweat the small stuff.
P.S. (It's all small stuff!)"
"Don't sweat the small stuff.
P.S. (It's all small stuff!)"
today I went out with a friend to a christmas event at a 5 star hotel, first the lightening of christmas tree and children of one of the schools here singing christmas songs, followed by an excellent buffet diner. But not nor me. I had my dinner (sardines, broccoli and apple sauce, nothing less and nothing more) before we left, actually ate in the car. I had to glasses of wine and that's it. And did I had a nice evening, yes I did, I enjoyed my wine, talking to people, met some new people, people I haven't talked to in a long time. Some felt sorry for me and I only felt a but strange, sitting there them all eating and me with just a glass of wine. But more strange in the sense "what may they think of me". For not a second I was distracted by the food or wish I could eat all that too. I was totally fine with it.
Also I was great that the management allowed me to join for just drinks and no food. The deal was I pay for my wine, but in the end I did not even had to pay for that.
I don't know exactly how it works, but it seems possible when you are on a strict diet as many of us are, you are able to join an excellent buffet dinner, do not eat and still have a good time.
Also I was great that the management allowed me to join for just drinks and no food. The deal was I pay for my wine, but in the end I did not even had to pay for that.
I don't know exactly how it works, but it seems possible when you are on a strict diet as many of us are, you are able to join an excellent buffet dinner, do not eat and still have a good time.
"As the sense of identity shifts from the imaginary person to your real being as presence awareness, the life of suffering dissolves like mist before the rising sun"
A week ago, we went to a catered birthday party at someone's home. When I got there, I asked to speak to the caterer, and told him I was GF/DF ( because this was sort of a last minute thing, I was not able to contact them earlier). They were wonderful--made me up a fruit plate for appetizers, kept my salad separate, with oil and vinegar, instead of the Caesar salad they were serving. Kept the sauce for the meat on the side so I could have "naked" beef. Basically, as I walked the buffet line, the caterer walked with me, telling me yes or no for each dish. It was all good. I had a total of five weddings this
summer/fall, and no problem eating at any of them. And, I am part of a dinner group that has been together for many years. Since I had to go GF/DF, they just give me a heads up on the menu, I bring what I have to and eat what I can.
I understand that some folks here have many more limitations than I do at the moment, but I can't tell you how encouraging it was for me to be able to get through all these occasions, and feel I didn't have to beg off because of food.
summer/fall, and no problem eating at any of them. And, I am part of a dinner group that has been together for many years. Since I had to go GF/DF, they just give me a heads up on the menu, I bring what I have to and eat what I can.
I understand that some folks here have many more limitations than I do at the moment, but I can't tell you how encouraging it was for me to be able to get through all these occasions, and feel I didn't have to beg off because of food.
Suze
Paula,
Great job on avoiding the gluten! I'm happy for you.
On Saturday my husband and I had dinner with friends at their home. They have spent many years in France so we were treated to a French dinner. The wife is DF and is trying to go GF, and was aware of my DF/GF needs. She prepared two kinds of diced cooked beets, thinly sliced cucumbers, shredded radish, diced avacados, plus chopped potatos and acorn squash with pork loin roast. The various vegetables were served each in separate dishes and had various vinegars on them. Everything was delicious!
Yesterday I was quite uncomfortable with C, to the point where my abdomen ached. I'm guessing that the sheer volume of veggies didn't agree with me. I went to bed early and felt better today.
Still, I have to say the care with which our hosts prepared the meal and respected my DF/GF needs was very much appreciated.
Bon appetite,
Sharaine
Great job on avoiding the gluten! I'm happy for you.
On Saturday my husband and I had dinner with friends at their home. They have spent many years in France so we were treated to a French dinner. The wife is DF and is trying to go GF, and was aware of my DF/GF needs. She prepared two kinds of diced cooked beets, thinly sliced cucumbers, shredded radish, diced avacados, plus chopped potatos and acorn squash with pork loin roast. The various vegetables were served each in separate dishes and had various vinegars on them. Everything was delicious!
Yesterday I was quite uncomfortable with C, to the point where my abdomen ached. I'm guessing that the sheer volume of veggies didn't agree with me. I went to bed early and felt better today.
Still, I have to say the care with which our hosts prepared the meal and respected my DF/GF needs was very much appreciated.
Bon appetite,
Sharaine
I went to a luncheon in someone's home last week. I told the hostess that I'd love to come, but since I have a limited diet, I'd bring my own food. I heated my tortillas with pork strips, added avocado, and was pretty content. No one made any comments about my food and we had a good time. I passed on the chocolate, fudge, and cookies.
Seeing food I can't eat doesn't bother me, but as I've mentioned before, the aroma of foods I used to love still makes me sad. DH is finished with his chocolate-making, and the aroma of chocolate is gone from the house. It was easier this year than last - it does get better.
Gloria
Seeing food I can't eat doesn't bother me, but as I've mentioned before, the aroma of foods I used to love still makes me sad. DH is finished with his chocolate-making, and the aroma of chocolate is gone from the house. It was easier this year than last - it does get better.
Gloria
You never know what you can do until you have to do it.
I agree, it is becoming easier to pass on the cookie trays. I used to feel like I was in some way being punished by not being able to eat all the things at family gatherings like everyone else but now I see the same thing as Paula when I look at food that are off limits- the bathroom. It's becoming more natural to quickly weigh the option of eat it and get sick or pass and eat something else. It seems weird that I now consider a good dessert to be a scoop of natural peanutbutter & some chocolate soy milk.
I'm just begining again on my GF/DF path so I haven't dealt with eating out yet because it scares me.
The only thing that still bothers me is when people give me that look like I'm one of those off-the-wall people with crazy beliefs. I'm a very private person so most don't know that I'm doing it for health reasons. My close friends and family know but I guess I shouldn't let the thoughts of aquaintences get me down. Although, I have found that some of changes have stuck. I was GF for a period of time over a year ago and I kept some of the same eating habits. Now I've realized this will be for life.
I'm just begining again on my GF/DF path so I haven't dealt with eating out yet because it scares me.
The only thing that still bothers me is when people give me that look like I'm one of those off-the-wall people with crazy beliefs. I'm a very private person so most don't know that I'm doing it for health reasons. My close friends and family know but I guess I shouldn't let the thoughts of aquaintences get me down. Although, I have found that some of changes have stuck. I was GF for a period of time over a year ago and I kept some of the same eating habits. Now I've realized this will be for life.
Deb,
I think you're smart to avoid eating out. I do eat out, and have almost since the beginning, but it is definitely a potential risk - probably the "weakest link" in my healing chain.
You are entitled to your privacy. In my opinion, no one is entitled to judge what you eat (it's not as though GF is the weirdest eating craze going on out there, either). I have found ways to avoid discussing my digestive condition over dinner (hello, people, MANNERS??), and you'll find things you're comfortable saying that effectively end a conversation you don't want to have. Sometimes just looking a rude person in the eye, with a pleasantly expectant smile, will do the trick - you're waiting for *them* to explain why they have some opinion displayed on their face, not trying to convince them of something you don't honestly care whether they accept or not.
You don't owe anyone an explanation, but if you choose to offer one, I recommend oversimplifying That gives the impertinent an opportunity to drift back to their real favorite subject - themselves...
I can also see how it might take a couple of runs at it to be sure that GF (and everything-else-F) is for life. My gluten 'crash' was so severe, it was very persuasive, but that's not true for everyone.
I used to skip a lot of stuff on cookie trays, back before MC, because sweets are not my biggest craving, and most cookies only tasted "OK" to me (and I prefer to eat "awesome"). Let me tell you, not eating cookies for any reason makes some people crazy. I shared an office with a fellow years ago who would get angry at me for not eating sweets I didn't want, because I was not overweight, and "could afford it." So the food-rudeness and insanity out there is free-floating, and probably happens even when we're not in the room to give it a focal point.
Oops, pet peeve alert!
Sara
I think you're smart to avoid eating out. I do eat out, and have almost since the beginning, but it is definitely a potential risk - probably the "weakest link" in my healing chain.
You are entitled to your privacy. In my opinion, no one is entitled to judge what you eat (it's not as though GF is the weirdest eating craze going on out there, either). I have found ways to avoid discussing my digestive condition over dinner (hello, people, MANNERS??), and you'll find things you're comfortable saying that effectively end a conversation you don't want to have. Sometimes just looking a rude person in the eye, with a pleasantly expectant smile, will do the trick - you're waiting for *them* to explain why they have some opinion displayed on their face, not trying to convince them of something you don't honestly care whether they accept or not.
You don't owe anyone an explanation, but if you choose to offer one, I recommend oversimplifying
That gives the impertinent an opportunity to drift back to their real favorite subject - themselves...I can also see how it might take a couple of runs at it to be sure that GF (and everything-else-F) is for life. My gluten 'crash' was so severe, it was very persuasive, but that's not true for everyone.
I used to skip a lot of stuff on cookie trays, back before MC, because sweets are not my biggest craving, and most cookies only tasted "OK" to me (and I prefer to eat "awesome"). Let me tell you, not eating cookies for any reason makes some people crazy. I shared an office with a fellow years ago who would get angry at me for not eating sweets I didn't want, because I was not overweight, and "could afford it." So the food-rudeness and insanity out there is free-floating, and probably happens even when we're not in the room to give it a focal point.
Oops, pet peeve alert!
Sara
Sara, I so agree with this. DH had a habit of eating anything with sugar in it. Over the years, I THINK(and I prefer to eat "awesome").
I've (kind of) convinced him to not bother to eat mediocre stuff. Save it for the good stuff. The pull of
sugar is really strong for him. I'm grateful it's not strong for me.....starches were my downfall.
Deb,
I was definitely a pastaholic. Now that I've shoved grains (and legumes) off the plate altogether, my tastebuds have adjusted. I do eat potatoes, winter squash, sweet potatoes, etc. - but these days I am surprised at how my husband portions things on the plate. For me, the "side dish" is very much off to the side, these days. I know that may change at some point, but for now, half of a sweet potato is HUGE - and way too much.
I wonder whether part of what drew me to vegetarianism wasn't the lure of starch... I don't meant to make light of ethical considerations, nor of those who sincerely see environmental and health reasons to eat that way, and those ideas were also a draw for me.
Sara
I was definitely a pastaholic. Now that I've shoved grains (and legumes) off the plate altogether, my tastebuds have adjusted. I do eat potatoes, winter squash, sweet potatoes, etc. - but these days I am surprised at how my husband portions things on the plate. For me, the "side dish" is very much off to the side, these days. I know that may change at some point, but for now, half of a sweet potato is HUGE - and way too much.
I wonder whether part of what drew me to vegetarianism wasn't the lure of starch... I don't meant to make light of ethical considerations, nor of those who sincerely see environmental and health reasons to eat that way, and those ideas were also a draw for me.
Sara