Trying not to be too sad

JFR · Post by **JFR** » Fri Apr 27, 2012 9:30 pm

Tomorrow my 31 year old daughter is getting married on the island of St Lucia to a man who lives there. She has known him about 6 years. She will be living there about 75% of the time, at least until he is able, hopefully, to get a visa to come to this country, something that is hard to do these days, even when married to a citizen. I will not be there nor have I ever met him. I have simply been too sick to even imagine getting on an airplane or figuring out how to eat there, especially since I am eating only a handful of foods right now. So she will get married while I take care of her chihuahua until September when the quarantine period is up and she can bring him to the island. St Lucia does not have any rabies so they are very strict about letting dogs into the country. It is sad missing her wedding. In some respects it was a relief to finally tell her several months ago that I could not come. The thought of traveling there, how I would manage it, was making me very anxious but still...There seem to be people here who travel and I can't imagine how they manage when just leaving the house is a challenge for me. Still, I am much better now that I have eliminated all but a few foods, so I am hopeful that I will be able to get to St Lucia one of these days. I am lucky that I have an understanding daughter.

Jean

Gloria · Post by **Gloria** » Fri Apr 27, 2012 9:46 pm

Jean,
I'm so sorry that you'll not be able to attend your daughter's wedding. It is helpful that she understands. You are helping by watching her chihauahua, and I'm sure she appreciates that. I'm sure you'll be able to travel to see her in the future, but it's still hard to watch our children move away.

Gloria

MBombardier · Post by **MBombardier** » Fri Apr 27, 2012 11:14 pm

I'm so sorry you won't be able to be there. My heart goes out to you. I hope they film the whole thing and take lots and lots of pictures!

Lesley · Post by **Lesley** » Fri Apr 27, 2012 11:43 pm

Jean - I know precisely how you feel. Do you have skype? Can you to her and her fiance using it? Maybe you can get someone with an Iphone of a laptol to put skype on it, and you can see the wedding live? It's amazing what you can do nowadays.

JFR · Post by **JFR** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 4:03 am

Thanks everyone. I knew this was a place I could talk about this. Because I have a lifetime of struggle with intestinal stuff, I have learned to stay pretty quiet about it. I think it is hard for people to understand. This just feels too big to suffer completely in silence. She's getting married at an eco-resort. I'm sure that she will post pictures soon after but the ceremony will have to happen without me present, either virtually or in reality. She has family and friends there and I am sure she will look beautiful. I'll get there someday.

Jean

Martha · Post by **Martha** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 6:20 am

Dear Jean,

I'm so sorry that you have to miss your daughter's wedding. That is hard for a mom. They know that you are with them in spirit, and that you would come if your health allowed it.

I hope that someday in the not too distant future, your health will allow it, and you'll be able to go visit them. Or that visa situation will get cleared up, and your son-in-law can come here.

Love,
Martha

marihabs · Post by **marihabs** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 7:04 am

Dear Jean,

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Leah · Post by **Leah** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 9:41 am

Oh Jean, my heart feels your pain. I have two daughters and it would be soooo hard not to be there with them. I truly hope you find relief from this awful condition that we have and that you can see your daughter and new son in the near future.

Leah

carolm · Post by **carolm** » Sat Apr 28, 2012 2:14 pm

Jean, I'm sorry too that you are unable to attend your daughters wedding. As a Mom that is tough to take but we understand completely how limiting this condition is. Thankfully so does your daughter.

Better times are ahead.

Carol