Milestone for Deb- went out to eat but didn't

[DebE13]

I never thought I'd be able to get over it. My priorities are changing and this one is a good thing. I had a total thyroidectomy last Tuesday and wasn't prepared for the whole body pain that was going to go with it. That's a whole different boo-hoo story but my husband and I went to our cabin for my recovery time once we were pretty sure I wasnt going to have any post surgery complications. I missed seeing my son this weekend because of not being at home so felt a little down about that. We're home now and we drove to campus (he lives only 40minutes away) to take him out to eat. I didn't stress at all. He picked where he wanted to go and after looking it up online it didn't look like a good place for me. I've had a change in my bathroom habits that I don't want to tamper with right now. It may be post surgery stuff slowing my guts down, the 600mg of calcium I have to take 3x a day (read it could cause C), or the Tylenol/hydrocodone I've taken (only two since I got the Rx filled). Anyway, it seemed like a poor choice to risk it so I just ate before we left. I viewed it as not making the trip to eat dinner but to catch up with my son since I haven't seen him since before the surgery. We text each other everyday but it just isn't be same.

I remember others posting that eating but not eating wasn't a big deal. I was always a bit jealous. I've tried before but it did always bother me and I'd leave feeling down or angry. Tonight I ordered a side of pears and a cup of coffee. I had a lara bar just in case i felt deprived but it served as a security blanket. I got to visit my baby, catch up on his college activities, and do something normal.

Thank you to everyone who continue to post the good stuff too. Reading the frustrations help me to know I'm not alone and gives me ideas of what to do or not to do. The positive stories let me know that still living is possible and if others have found a way to do it, so can I! I did it! Haha, it's like I should get a gold star for the day for good behavior.

We won't talk about yesterday though I plan to ask my endo tomorrow if he plans to write a script for Valium for my husband. I've been on an emotional roller coaster and he is stuck riding shotgun.

[Lesley]

Deb, I know the he eats I watch thing. I do/did that with my son weekly till he moved.

I feel for you!

[carolm]

I actually am not jealous when we go out and eat and there is little or nothing I can eat. Like you said it's nice to just catch up with others and if I've planned ahead I've probably eaten before we went. I just view it as escaping the misery I would surely go through if I ate something I shouldn't. And in the long haul, that hour we spend at the restaurant pales in comparison to the activities I'll be able to do the rest of the day because I stuck to my diet.
It pays off in the long haul. Well worth the discipline.

Hang in there, Deb.

Carol

[DebE13]

Leslie, somehow when it comes to my son I'm a little more willing to put the me-me-me's aside because even at 18 I'm still the one setting the example. He has his own severe health issues and I look up to him because he rarely complains. The emotional food connection was, for me at least, a hard one to put behind me.

Carol, I can "feel" your reasoning now and totally agree. I always knew in my mind eating what I know hurts my body was a bad thing and not worth the temporary satisfaction only to face possible days of being sick after. Yesterday was great, I knew it would be a bad idea to risk it and I didn't and had no cheated feeling about it. It's nice to finally get to that part of the MC acceptance.