Life sure hands out lousy hands

barbaranoela · Post by **barbaranoela** » Tue Jan 26, 2010 11:38 am

Have 2 friends that have been dealing with cancer--
Dan's(lou's cousin) second wife is dealing with Lymphona --next week they are going to operate--by opening up a section in her brain in order to shoot the chemo in--this I never heard of---Dan lost first wife-Noreen-(my buddy in crime) to colon cancer--

And Lou's friend--whom he worked with as a mechanic and remained best buds when Kenny bec ame his boss is dealing with melanoma---has already lost one kidney--with a section of the other kidney removed--just recovered from pneumonia --other sections of his body invaded 2--
I am sure we all wonder *why* them---great good fun luving peoples!!!
And there among us- who are the pits of the world- keep going on leading happy healthy lives--
--there is Juliette--who hasnt even lived a life--fading away~~~~

I dont get the justice??? well maybe I am not to understand the reasoning for all the heartaches---

As the priest said--when Noreen died--God needed her for better things--
We were at the house when the priest showed up to offer sympathies and after he replied with that *phrase*-Diane-(daughter) jumped up and right into the priest face she yelled *NO--my mom is needed here--she hasnt even seen her first grandchild born*!!!
Well needless to say--I had to get my feelings out~~~
sorry~~~~

Barbara

Post by **Rosie** » Tue Jan 26, 2010 1:54 pm

Barbara, life sure doesn't seem fair sometimes (make that most of the time)! All we can do is try to support each other. I have problems with a lot of the platitudes handed out, like that priest you mentioned. When I'm feeling bad I don't want to hear "God doesn't give you more than you can handle", or "When one door closes another one opens". I want someone to validate my feelings by saying "That really sucks, and what can I do to help".

I know that you will be there for your friends and family doing whatever you can in your own special way...........

Rosie

Jan · Post by **Jan** » Tue Jan 26, 2010 2:39 pm

Rosie, you said it all.

Barbara, what can I do to help you from long distance? I continue to send you hugs through the air.

:bigbighug:

Jan

Stanz · Post by **Stanz** » Wed Jan 27, 2010 7:11 pm

Barbara, it always seems as if tragedies come one right after another. We cannot control our genetics, it is who we are and dictates our predictive health. Perfect response by Rosie, I'm glad Diane said what she did, anger is the first sign of acceptance IMO, platitudes like that are for people who don't question. Few people deserve to die and certainly it would seem that often it is the truly good humans who are taken too soon. When it comes to genetics, there is no justice, if our genetics don't kill us, then apparently the environment eventually will.

Encourage everyone you know to register for the Bone Marrow Registry, it saved my friend's life and her donor wouldn't have registered except that his own wife had cancer.

You have to be under 60, so I'm too old now and can't donate anymore, but I cannot imagine anything better than waking up every morning and knowing you saved a life.

MaggieRedwings · Post by **MaggieRedwings** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 7:24 am

Morning Barbara,

Life sure is twisted at times and I am well aware that you know that. So sorry for the losses in your life and do hope things will not get you down.

Here for you.

Love, Maggie

ant · Post by **ant** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 11:23 am

Dear Barbara,

The gift of life is wonderful but, as you know all too well, it is also sad and painful. I hope that love mitigates some of the pain.

Best wishes and prayers, Ant

Post by **tex** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 1:34 pm

Barbara,

I'm pretty sure you know how I feel about things like that - I'm right there with you.

Luve,
Galahad

CAMary · Post by **CAMary** » Thu Jan 28, 2010 2:53 pm

Barbara-

It is such a hard thing sometimes - it is human nature to want to know "why". You know, I've concluded sometimes there just "isn't" an answer. And as to why some people are taken before their time - well, I heard this lovely explanation from our new pastor at a funeral...

The funeral was for the 19 year old daughter of one of the ladies in my breast cancer support group who was killed in a drunk-driving accident...he said "It's okay to be angry with God - he's a tough guy - he can take it! And he will understand. What happened was NOT God's will - it was a horrible, tragic accident. Laura was in the prime of her life, and her future was stolen from her. It was not some sort of punishment, it is just something tragic that happened. Find comfort that she is now in heaven where you will one day be reunited, although the loss of a child is never "God's will" - it is out-of-order for a parent to bury a child. Go ahead and be angry."

I found it comforting to be told it "okay to be angry" and not be told the trite "it's God's will"...

Hugs to you Barbara!

Love,
Mary

Mars · Post by **Mars** » Fri Jan 29, 2010 11:40 am

Hello my

friend!

I'm so sorry to hear about your loved ones. I so agree with what Rosie said, I couldn't have said it better.

I have you in my thoughts and prayers along with those that are sick.

You are very dear to me so please take care of YOURSELF!

Mars

Gloria · Post by **Gloria** » Fri Jan 29, 2010 9:30 pm

Barbara,

I'm so sorry that so many people close to you are suffering. My thoughts and prayers are with them and you.

Gloria

Polly · Post by **Polly** » Sat Jan 30, 2010 9:06 am

Hiya Sis,

Hang in there.......life is such a roller coaster, isn't it? I went into medicine to try to reduce disease, pain and suffering, and the hardest lesson for me was that there is eventually a limit to what can be done to save a life. When that limit is reached, you can only offer love and compassion. Am thinking about you....... :bigbighug:

Love,

Polly

JoAnn · Post by **JoAnn** » Sat Jan 30, 2010 12:34 pm

Hi Barbara, just adding my love and thoughts of you with all the others.
Love JoAnn