Need A Good Laugh?

[tex]

Wow! This Is My Lucky Day! Look at what was in my mail box, (e-mail, that is), this morning:

Attn:Beneficiary,

Under the United Nations scam victims rehabilitation scheme,you are to be paid the sum of $1,5m You are thereby advised to contact the UN appointed officer in Nigeria through the following information.

Name: Dr Okele Okele
Tel: +234-813-968-6829
Email: drokeleookele1@gmail.com

Regards,

Mrs Tammy Raymond.



Of course, there's some question in my mind as to just exactly how much money $1,5m might actually turn out to be, but you can tell at a glance, that this is a totally legitimate program, just by looking at the various details. First off, it's from the United Nations, (unitednations0098@mail.kz) so you know its on the up and up. Of course, I'm not sure why the United Nations would put that "0098" in their address, but I'm sure there's a good reason. Also the "kz" at the end stands for Kazakhstan, but I suppose that just means that the UN has moved their headquarters from the East side of Manhattan, (in New York City), to Kazakhstan, without bothering to tell anyone.

It was addressed to "undisclosed recipients: ;", but what the heck? That's close enough for me - why be a nit picker?

And, this much-needed program is apparently being administered by a highly-respected UN-appointed officer in Nigeria, (we all know that Nigeria pretty much has the market cornered on creative, and honest internet personalities - their credentials are impeccable, as far as I can tell).

But, above all, just look at the name of this worthy program - "the United Nations scam victims rehabilitation scheme". All I can say is, it's about time that the victims of decades of internet scams, (mostly connected with unscrupulous Nigerian royalty, etc.), are being compensated for their losses. I can't help but wonder why the United Nations chose to call it a "scheme", but what the heck, if they're going to give out all that money, who gives a hoot?

And good old Dr Okele Okele even has a gmail address. I guess they don't pay the poor devil enough to use anything other than a free service. Surely he wouldn't be trying to hide anything, by using a "throwaway" e-mail address.

I'm sure not going to rock the boat, though, by questioning anything about this kind offer of restitution, because if I do, they might discover that not only did I not apply for this "rehabilitation" compensation, but I haven't even been a victim of one of those scams, in the past. I sure wouldn't want to be cut out of this "windfall", so I'm gonna keep my mouth shut, and just take the money.

Seeing this in my mail this morning got my day off to a good start. Fortunately, I'm getting to where I can laugh now, with only minimal pain.

I hope your day is off to a great start, too.

Love,
Tex

[barbaranoela]

Galahad!!!!! by jezzzers -well what a lucky guy U are to have such *luck* fall into your lap!!

Boy now I have a great friend with lottsa $$$$$$$ too---

Your best buddy-
Columbo

[JLH]

There should be an award for creativity in phishing scams. The "Phishy"?

If you have a GMail account, you will get those darn emails every day.

[Rosie]

There should be an award for creativity in phishing scams. The "Phishy"?

Joan, these Nigerian scams have actually been given an award, the "Ig Nobel Prize for Literature" in in 2005. The Ig Nobel Prize Awards are presented at the same time as the Nobel Prize Awards at Harvard, and are pretty funny. They usually are for genuine scientific achievement with some sort of humorous or twisted element.

Literature - Presented to the Internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria, for creating and then using e-mail to distribute a bold series of short stories, thus introducing millions of readers to a cast of rich characters — General Sani Abacha, Mrs. Mariam Sanni Abacha, Barrister Jon A Mbeki Esq., and others — each of whom requires just a small amount of expense money so as to obtain access to the great wealth to which they are entitled and which they would like to share with the kind person who assists them.

If you want a few laughs, here is a list of all the prizes awarded since 1991. Tex, read at your own peril.....I don't want you to have a relapse!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Ig ... ze_winners

Rosie

[MaggieRedwings]

Well Hot Damn Tex!

You and I can retire because I got the same invitation this morning too. If I had posted this, it would not have been nearly as funny as yours. I was actually sitting here laughing my head off at your writing prowess. You almost make it sound legit.

Love, Maggie

[JLH]

Thanks, Rosie, that's great........

[Polly]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Tex, you and the good Nigerian doc have made my day!

Your comments were wonderful - my stomach hurt from laughing at them. Your highlighting of the word "scheme" is priceless! And Rosie, I didn't know about those awards. Hysterical!

Thanks.......and good to see that you can laugh again without too much pain.

Love,

Polly

[starfire]

Now I'm kicking myself for passing up so many "opportunites" like this!! If I'd only suspected they were on the level. HaHa

Thanks for the laugh and I'm glad you were able to do the same.

Love, Shirley

[Bifcus16]

Maybe I should introduce you to my boss!!

I had a meeting today to explain why even though my team blocks 88% of incoming mail, some of the remaining 12% is still spam. I should have pointed out how lucky she is to get so many great offers

Tex, I've got some other great offers I am sure I could forward on, if you would like.

Oh, and the UN actually is in Kazakstan : http://www.un.kz/en/kazakhstan

So obviously this was all above board..

Lyn

[tex]

Lyn,

The UN has a presence in Nigeria, also, http://www.ng.undp.org/ , but I just assumed they would be disbursing all that moola from their headquarters - I could be wrong, obviously. I appreciate your generous offer to forward additional lucrative offers, but to be honest, I'm afraid that the one I received this morning will be enough to fill all the small-town bank vaults around here to overflowing, so if I were to take advantage of any additional offers, I would have a real problem on my hands, trying to find a place to stash all the money.

Thanks for thinking of me, though.


Rosie,

Thanks. I enjoyed reviewing every one of those awards. Obviously, a lot of academics have way too much time on their hands.

Tex

[Gabes-Apg]

write back and tell them to forward the money to good quality researchers to find out why MC exists !