Another day working for the man....

[Olivia-Micro-Colitis]

Still waiting on the coffee to brew on this most yucky of mornings. Its been raining for a while and it freezing outside! (COFFEE'S DONE!) ok i feel a lil bit better now. So lets see where to start.....
Last week i did a bake sale at the squadron for our Take Steps Team. WE raised $130. so i was pretty proud!
i have been feeling kinda low lately. Probably because i'm sick every other day. I had to get my CT Scan the other day. That was weird. I wasn't expecting the dye to make my whole body feel warm.
I've also noticed people at work how they look down at me being sick all the time. it makes me resent them. i didn't ask for this ya know. That are starting to treat me like crap and i'm getting sick of it! I'm a bout to blow my lid and in the military we are really not allowed to blow our lids on our superiors. On eof these days i'm gonna break. i need to figure out how to get rid of this stress. SO i went and got a yoga book and dvd. They say it helps with stress i guess i'll give it a shot. it couldn't hurt.
I've been vomitting a lot again. more IVs. I'm getting tired of being stuck by needles every other day! I'm tired of feeling just tired. i can't even walk up strairs with out getting winded. i feel like i'm a 21 yr old stuck in an older womans body. the things i used to do like lifting a box...i can't even do that.
Last night i was in a lot of pain. My left wrist hurt so bad i couldn't bend it. my back was killing me! my whole body seemed to ache in pain! my whole left arm was just hurting so bad. I dunno what was wrong with me. I've had a lot of frequent head aches as well. anyone else feel this way on Entocort?
yesterday was a hard day for me. Too much stress all at once. I was so exhausted and i worked a half day! maybe thats why i was hurting so bad when i got home last night. i haven't done things at that pace in a long time. I just wasnt ready to get beat up that fast. I'm still to sick to be 110% at my job. I cried when i got home i was so frustrated with all the stupid stuff. I'm tired of fixing everyone's mistakes. I just can't work miricles right now.
My brother chris got dumped by his girlfriend of 6 yrs this past weekend. hes been really upset and even crying (hes 24). It makes me feel bad because i'm dealing with the emotional stress and depression of my life and its just so hard to deal with his.
Will(my husband) and i are moving into a new place next week. We are down sizing because of money issues. he gets out of the Marine Corps in September so we will be saving $200 by our move. The place is a lot smaller but it'll do for now i guess.
I'm sorry i've venting but i kinda needed it. i know i have people here for me like my friends and family but its different bc they really can't relate like all you can so thank you.
-Olivia

[starfire]

My Dear,
You can always vent here. We almost all do it at one time are another. I'm really sorry you are having a hard time with the people at work. Nobody understands what it's like to have this disease, especially when it's flaring, unless they have been there.

Glad you are trying some outlets for your stress. I sure hope it helps.

Try to take it one day at a time and just try to handle what you have to when you have to do it.

Love, Shirley

[Stanz]

Hi Olivia,

I'm sorry that you are continuing to have so many struggles and health issues. Moving at this time is certainly an added stress.

I noticed that you said that you often pick up prepared foods (on Ant's "Chef" thread). I'd caution you that quite often MSG is used even in fresh prepared foods, so you may be having a reaction to that. 10 years ago when I had 2 kids in college and lots of bills, I was working every day I could. I used to buy "fresh" foods and microwave them, cause the last thing I wanted to do was to cook for myself after cooking all day. I went through very much what you have described here:

Last night i was in a lot of pain. My left wrist hurt so bad i couldn't bend it. my back was killing me! my whole body seemed to ache in pain! my whole left arm was just hurting so bad. I dunno what was wrong with me. I've had a lot of frequent head aches as well. anyone else feel this way on Entocort?

I would describe what I felt as being thrown against a wall violently, I hurt everywhere. I'd come home from work and could barely stand when I got out of my van. I would end up in tears asking myself how I was going to get all my dishes washed and prep for the next day. It was scary, overwhelming and depressing. All I could do was to try to sleep it off.

Well, I was having a reaction to MSG. When I cut it out of my diet completely, nearly all of those symptoms disappeared. MSG is made from fermented soy or grain. So, I don't know if it was just too much added to stress, being GS and not knowing it yet, or what, but if you are going to keep eating these prepared foods, you need to have a talk with those making them and find out if they are using MSG. And, also, keep in mind that they OFTEN LIE about this and they often don't know what is in any sauce mixes, etc. that they might use.

I have no experience with Entocort, so I don't know if this is a common reaction.

Connie

[Gabes-Apg]

Olivia

big hugs firstly (are we allowed to hug marines? he he he)
Vent away.... it is important to get this stuff out of your head (and gut) otherwise you it will totally consume you....


Work - you are a very positive proactive person that shows empathy. it is rare. sometimes it is hard to accept that alot of people out there dont have those qualities (and never will) in some cases their attitude is their unsettlements coming out. easier said than done .... try not to let it stress you as the stress is not good for ya
and as i said in my other post, they cant see what is going on, they dont feel the pain or the headaches, all the symptoms are internal they dont know what it is like to have chronic D or excessive vomitting. Most people i know say they had a bad stomach bug that lasted 3 days... they can imagine what it is like to have it for weeks or even months.....
if you had a broken ankle and was on crutches their attitude would be different..... sucky hey


Home and moving.. the stress and energy will benefit you and you will get some benefits in the short term it will be worth the energy.

Yoga is good. I get up each morning and do yoga stretches and breathing/meditation type stuff. then have my coffee... which is what i am doing now (it is 5am here)
this has helped alot.

HOpe today is a better day....

[Rome]

Hang in there Olivia!

I too have had lots of stess in my life these past few months with my mother moving in with us and trying to adjust. It has been very stressful, and I held alot of that in so not to stress the rest of my family. My whole routine has had to change, and I have not been able to rest as much as usual. I work 12 hour night shifts in a busy ER, sleep days. I was so tired, not feeling good, frustrated, feeling like I have lost control of my houme. A few weeks ago I lost it. I had to lock myself in my room and cried for hours. I didn't tell my husband about my stress until he called me while I was crying and I just had to vent. I felt so much better afterwards. I don't think anyone realizes how frustrating and stressful life with MC is besides those closest to us. It is good to vent. We cannot do this by ourselves. We are all here for you and for eachother. If you don't mind, I will say a prayer for you your family. Good luck with the move.

Romanita

[Olivia-Micro-Colitis]

Thank you all! You all are so supportive!