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Thanks for your thoughtful responses everyone. So far the woman hasn't called me. I am wondering if she reconsidered if her children should see Missie - it could actually be hard for the kids. Maybe she realized Missie was in a great home and decided to let it go. I am not opposed to letting them visit Missie as my son suggested - to me that is win win, at least for the humans.
Thanks for youe insight into canine behavior Gayle. That was very helpful. I am getting caught up in human emotion - I don't want to cause this family further pain now that they know she is alive (it's only been 2 years, not 5), so if she calls I will suggest visits and am perfectly OK wth that (not sharing but visits) . . .and it would totally be for the humans involved. I know I would want someone to consider my feelings if the situation were reversed. I know I won't give her back because I know the things I have done for her have extended her life. She is actually quite healthy and you never know - she could live as long as our dog Sam (18.5 years).
This whole thing caught me so off guard and I have felt the gamut of emotions. Missie is reaping the benefits of it though - lots of extra love being directed her way since it happened.
Mary Beth
Off topic . . . a dog lovers story
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Gloria said,
Wellllll … actually, while I am always glad, (and happy), to see them come, I’m never really unhappy to see them go!!!
Children fall into quite a different category tho --- as the anticipation of a day when they will become mature enough (?), and educated enough (?), and willing enough (?) to become independent from Mom and Dad is quite different than the life long commitment made to a dependant animal’s welfare. After 22 or so years of preparing kids to hopefully be able to fend for themselves – a successful launch is (IMHO) how to spell relief.
In regard to the dogs, I don’t actually view myself as owner -- although legally speaking that is true. Rather, my view is that of committing to more of a stewardship role, by assuming responsibility for an animals best interest’s (to the best of one’s ability) for their life.
JoAnn said,
Oh for sure, those Harriott stories were great. Didn’t PBS run a series based on those books? They were far superior to most of the junk on TV today. They could well dust them off and run again. (Again IMHO of course)
You have a “nervous” Lab? The first think I think about in relation to that statement is to wonder if the dog is actually getting enough exercise? Isn’t it one of Caesar Millan’s motto’s that “A tired dog is a good dog”? Lab’s don’t typically require any-where near the amount of mind and body exercise that - for example - a Border Collie needs, ---- but still, getting sufficient exercise does help make any dog more receptive to training. Also, lots of practice at socialization. A dog that is unsure of itself and its surroundings is more apt to be nervous about life experiences in general. Consistent socialization is a confidence building game.
And Mary Beth,
I do believe that now that you have had time to think about this situation, -- should it actually present itself (which it may not) -- you will handle things well.
For sure -- Missy could, and very well may, live for quite a while longer. The thing is however, that by the time a dog reaches the age you are guestimating here, most of them are probably into bonus time – which should be viewed as gift.
Cheers all,
Gayle
Once the children return home for extended visits, we have to adjust our lifestyle to accomodate them and it's with mixed feelings that we say goodbye again.
Wellllll … actually, while I am always glad, (and happy), to see them come, I’m never really unhappy to see them go!!!
Children fall into quite a different category tho --- as the anticipation of a day when they will become mature enough (?), and educated enough (?), and willing enough (?) to become independent from Mom and Dad is quite different than the life long commitment made to a dependant animal’s welfare. After 22 or so years of preparing kids to hopefully be able to fend for themselves – a successful launch is (IMHO) how to spell relief.
In regard to the dogs, I don’t actually view myself as owner -- although legally speaking that is true. Rather, my view is that of committing to more of a stewardship role, by assuming responsibility for an animals best interest’s (to the best of one’s ability) for their life.
JoAnn said,
I've got a hyper lab that I wish he (Caesar Millan) could give me some pointers on ...
Another good read for dog/animal lovers is the series by James Herriott,
Oh for sure, those Harriott stories were great. Didn’t PBS run a series based on those books? They were far superior to most of the junk on TV today. They could well dust them off and run again. (Again IMHO of course)
You have a “nervous” Lab? The first think I think about in relation to that statement is to wonder if the dog is actually getting enough exercise? Isn’t it one of Caesar Millan’s motto’s that “A tired dog is a good dog”? Lab’s don’t typically require any-where near the amount of mind and body exercise that - for example - a Border Collie needs, ---- but still, getting sufficient exercise does help make any dog more receptive to training. Also, lots of practice at socialization. A dog that is unsure of itself and its surroundings is more apt to be nervous about life experiences in general. Consistent socialization is a confidence building game.
And Mary Beth,
I do believe that now that you have had time to think about this situation, -- should it actually present itself (which it may not) -- you will handle things well.
For sure -- Missy could, and very well may, live for quite a while longer. The thing is however, that by the time a dog reaches the age you are guestimating here, most of them are probably into bonus time – which should be viewed as gift.
Cheers all,
Gayle
An update on the Missie/Misty saga. Her original owner called and we had our first visit today. The woman was very sweet - she brought Missie's leash, her original adoption papers and a few pictures of her. We shared stories about her and her 5 children got to play with her. Missie happily played with them but when she got tired she came over to me. We figured out that I found Missie about 3 weeks after she ran away. I believe it was the woman, not the children, who needed closure. I'm sure she would love to have Missie back but after visiting with us I think she felt relieved that Missie had such a good home. We'll probably will have an occasional visit and I will keep them updated on what's going on with her. I feel much better about now that we had a chance to meet and talk . . . in the end I think it all worked out for everyone, especially Missie.
Mary Beth
Mary Beth
Mary Beth,
So nice to hear about this good outcome.
Thanks for bringing us up to date.
By presenting to you with Missie’s leash and adoption records this lady was symbolically, as well as officially, relinquishing Missie to you. Quite probably she just couldn’t bring herself to find the words to say what these gifts meant?
And, --- isn’t the dog’s capacity to communicate - without words - always amazing. Missie ‘told‘ everyone where her primary loyalty is now -- SHE thinks SHE belongs with you.
Great Job!
Happy 4th everyone,
Gayle
So nice to hear about this good outcome.
Thanks for bringing us up to date.By presenting to you with Missie’s leash and adoption records this lady was symbolically, as well as officially, relinquishing Missie to you. Quite probably she just couldn’t bring herself to find the words to say what these gifts meant?
And, --- isn’t the dog’s capacity to communicate - without words - always amazing. Missie ‘told‘ everyone where her primary loyalty is now -- SHE thinks SHE belongs with you.
Great Job! Happy 4th everyone,
Gayle