Another Wait & See?

[jodibelle352]

It's 2:17 a.m. and just could not sleep so here I am again. David is finally resting more comfortably. The nurse from Heartland came in several times today and they've increased his morphine and also put him on an antibiotic. To early to say wether he'll fight off this latest bought with pneumonia. At least his temp. is down from 101.9 - 99.8 so that's at least a little more promising.

All the workers with Heartland have been amazing and very supportive. Jennifer who is the social worker comes regularly and calls just to see how I'm coping. LOL She has adopted me I'm thinking. Making sure I'm eating like I should and not neglecting myself. (As if I would do anything like that? )

Thank You to all of you who replied to my post and to everyone who is keeping David & I in your prayers. All your love, support and prayers mean the world to me. You have NO IDEA how much.

My grandma use to tell me when I was young; "Never pray for lesser burdens but for broader shoulders." Oh Man! Those words are constantly coming to mind on a regular hourly minute by minute basis at this time.

David & I have discussed at great length what his wishes are and what he does not want to happen. I'm doing my very best to honor his request but it's so very hard sometimes. Especially when I want him well and know in my heart as well as my head that I'm not going to get what I want. I've come to the realization that there is only so much a persons body can take and when the body can no longer function the way it should then the Angels will come and take him from me. It may not be today but I know it's going to happen and I'm NOT PREPARED for Letting Go!

How am I doing? Well............. I was doing quite well on the probiotics up until 2 weeks ago and once again have gone back on the Entocort 6mgs. daily. Almost 100% certain that the emotional stress of this situation finally took it's toll on me and the Big D came back like a vengence. Did not wait to see if in a day or two things would change I just went back on the Entocort as the last thing I needed was to deal with the D constantly. Right now the Entocort is working very well and I'm not worried about trying to lower my dosage or get off it anytime soon. I've got enough on my mind without trying to get off Entocort.

My love goes out to all of you as well as I'm sending a special hug to all my family here that all have a HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!!!


Love & God's Blessings!
Jodi

[Jan]

Dearest Jodi,

I am glad to hear that you have the wonderful support of the hospice organization. Please take advantage of everything they offer to you. I have been in two family situations where we used hospice and know how wonderful they can be. I was so impressed the first time that I became a hospice volunteer and remained one for several years.

You have been in my prayers for a number of months. I added David yesterday.

You are a strong lady and we are here for you when you need us.

Jan

[Joefnh]

Jodi I have not had the pleasure of speaking with you before, but I have read your recent posts and my heart goes out to you in this time. Your strength and positive attitude are inspiring.

I would like to say that I have added you and husband to our prayers and our hope is that the peace and strength of our Lord blesses your house.

There is a verse I would like to share with you that my daughter (an artist) recently included in a picture of a beautiful eagle in flight in the mountains.

Isaiah 40:18-31
Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.


Best Wishes & Hugs

--Joe

[Mars]

Jody,

My heart aches while reading your posts and want you to know that you and David are in my thoughts and prayers. I pray that the heartbreak of this difficult time will be lessened and carried by your loving friends and family who love you both.

Hospice volunteers and staff are God's angels put on earth to lessen the burden on the sick and those that love them. I lost my mother in 2000 and the volunteers still send cards and well-wishes to my sister's and I.

Love and gentle hugs to you both,
Mars

[JLH]

Dear Jodi,

Glad to hear that David was resting more comfortably. I'm so happy his temperature is down.

Jennifer sounds like your very own wonderful and caring. I'm so happy you have her in your life. "As if", indeed. You mind her, you hear.

Entocort is a good thing. I hope it keeps on helping you at this terribly stressful time.

My prayers for David and you.

Love and hugs,
Joan

[JoAnn]

Dear Jodi, I just read your posts and want you to know you and your David are in my thoughts and prayers. I also want to tell you that when I first joined this board I was so touched by your posts and all you had been through. By opening up yourself and sharing so much of your personal experiences, you strengthened me and gave me hope. I'm glad you have "angels" around you helping and that you are taking care of yourself. I know there is great power in faith and prayer and just know that mine is added to yours along with all the others on this board. Love JoAnn

[Gloria]

My heart goes out to you and David. I hope you will both be able to be with your children on Mother's day.

I'm so glad that Entocort has been able to take at least one burden away from you for the time being. Also relieved that you are surrounded by warm and caring people who are being angels for you and David.

Love,
Gloria